“奥古斯都”的故事——赛斯解析多重人格障碍的经典案例（续篇）

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 “奥古斯都”的故事（上）

“奥古斯都”的故事（中）

“奥古斯都”的故事（下）

现在让我们回到奥古斯都的话题，因为在这里我们又在一个人身上找到了一个极好的例子，说明了看似非物质的思想和信念能够影响和改变肉体形象。

首先，奥古斯都曾被以各种方式告知：“你想得太多了。你应该多活动身体，参加体育运动，更外向些。”这种一再重复的评论，加上其他童年条件，使他害怕自己的精神活动。同时他也觉得自己没有价值，那么他的念头怎么会是好的呢？

暴戾的情绪很早就累积起来了，但是在他的家庭里，没有任何可接受的方式来释放正常的攻击性情绪。当这些情绪逐渐积聚成可感觉到的、暴力式的爆发时，奥古斯都就更相信他的天性是不可接受的。在他十几岁时的正常状态里，他有一阵子越来越努力求“好”。这意味着驱除各种各样的思想或冲动——不论它们是与性有关的，还是具有攻击性的，甚或只是非传统的。相当多的能量被用来抑制这部分的内在体验。然而，被否定的精神事件并没有消失，它们的强度越来越大，却与他平时那些“较安全的”念头隔开了。

以这样一种方式，奥古斯都实际上创造出了一个精神结构，这种结构的组建遵循了我在你们休息之前所讲的原则。在其他环境下，另外一个拥有不同个性的人可能通过真实的攻击来损害某个身体器官，就像它可能被病毒实实在在地攻击一样。然而，由于奥古斯都独特的气质和天性，以及他生来就有却未照常规发展的创造性，他形成了一个结构，而不是破坏了一个。

在他的正常状态下，他只接受他认为应该接受的信念。正如前面提到的，在他的病情发展之前，曾有一段时间，他的“好我的念头”和“坏我的念头”在争宠，而身体拼命试图对经常不断、换来换去又常常矛盾的概念做出反应。

结果形成了这样一个局面：虽然奥古斯都在大部分时间里维持着自己的完整性，但相互冲突的一套套思想和情绪终于轮值起来。但是那些被他推开的信念，由于同类相吸，立即被另外那个精神结构抓住了——那个结构也是由意念和感觉组成，化合成你们可认为是一种无形的细胞组织，具备了所有的反应能力。

在奥古斯都正常的状态里，他会想到自己的无力——因为他克制了自己正常的攻击性行为——而感到自己很软弱。这些信念启动了身体的细胞记忆，使身体虚弱，阻碍了身体的机能。然而有一段时间，他行动迟钝，但却很稳定，维持了一个适合他目的的平衡。

他开始担心身体会失去控制而做出暴力行为，因为他无疑感觉得到那被否定的思想情绪的力量。当危机出现或者他陷入绝望时，一种他假装没有注意到的加速便启动了，接着奥古斯都第二就出现了。

奥古斯都第二充满了力量感——因为奥古斯都认为力量是错的，而把力量与他所认为的正常自己分开了。然而奥古斯都知道身体需要活力，那是他一直拒绝给予身体的。因此奥古斯都第二出场了，带着他对非凡力量、活力和优越感的伟大构想，带着他对杰出的英雄主义的幻想，以及被奥古斯都自己否定的关于所有那些东西的记忆。

被奥古斯都轻易遗忘了的攻击性行为，现在都被奥古斯都第二满怀欢喜地回想起来了。结果是，身体的化学性质立即恢复了生气。肌肉张力大大改善，血糖含量发生变化，整个身体的能量流动也改变了。

我知道当鲁柏会见奥古斯都的时候，这个年轻人把他自己的左半边认作奥古斯都第二。在他的正常状态里，身体的那一边比右侧包含了更多的紧张。

在奥古斯都第二身上，当最初一阵子的活跃过后，这种紧张得到了释放，能量的流动也变得较为平稳。然而，奥古斯都第二待得越久，他的地位就变得越弱——这是奥古斯都和奥古斯都第二都体会到的事实。你看，奥古斯都必须借由一个他无法应付的情况，而累积起足够多的被压抑的思想情感。这种潜在危险于是导致了奥古斯都第二的出现。你认为身体必须怎样表现，它就会照此表现，因此奥古斯都和奥古斯都第二，带着他们交替的行为模式，导致了身体以完全不同的方式反应。

现在暂且忘掉在这种情形下发生的这种分裂，反过来，想象你所拥有的连续不断的思想感受。当你感到软弱时，你就是软弱的。当你感到喜悦时，你的身体就会受益而变得更强健。奥古斯都的例子只是以夸张的形式展示了信念对肉体形象的影响。如果你想：“啊哈，那么从现在起，我只想好的念头——这样我就会健康；同时抑制我的‘坏’念头，或不管怎么弄，只要不去想它们就好。”那么，你就正以自己的方式做奥古斯都做过的事。他开头就是相信他的一些想法是如此邪恶，必须不计一切地把它们弄得不存在。因此，抑制你认为是负面的想法，或设想它们是如此的可怕，并不是解决问题的办法。

完结篇

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SESSION 633

Now let us return to Augustus; for here we find again in one individual an excellent example of the way in which seemingly nonphysical thoughts and beliefs can affect and alter the corporeal image.

First of all, Augustus had been told in various ways, quote: 'You think too much. You should be doing something physical, involved in sports, more outgoing." Such repeated remarks, with other childhood conditions, made him afraid of his own mental activity. He also felt unworthy, so how could his thoughts be good?

Feelings of violence accumulated early, but in his family there were no acceptable ways of releasing normal aggressive feelings. When these built up into felt, violent eruptions, Augustus was only the more convinced of his unacceptable nature. For some time in his normal state as a teenager, he tried harder and harder to be "good." This meant the banishing of thoughts or impulses that were sexually inspired along various lines, aggressive, or even just unconventional. Considerable energy was used to inhibit these portions of his inner experience. The denied mental events did not disappear, however. They increased in intensity and were kept apart from his "safer" usual thoughts.

In such a way, Augustus actually created a mental structure whose organization followed the principles I mentioned before your break. Under other circumstances and possessing different characteristics, another individual could damage a physical organ by literally attacking it, as surely as it might be assaulted by a virus. Because of Augustus's particular temperament and nature, however, and his native though conventionally undeveloped creativity, he formed a structure rather than destroying one.

In his normal state he accepted only the beliefs he considered were expected of him. As mentioned, there was a time before his condition developed when his "good-self thoughts" and his "bad-self thoughts" vied for his attention, and the body tried desperately to react to constant, alternating and often contradictory concepts.

What developed was a situation in which the conflicting sets of thoughts and feelings finally took turns, though Augustus maintained his own integrity for most of the time. But those beliefs that he shoved away were, by attraction, instantly seized by the other mental structure—again, composed of ideas and feelings combined into what you might think of as an invisible cellular organization, with all capabilities of reaction.

In his normal condition Augustus thought of his own powerlessness—for he had denied himself normal aggressive action—and felt this weak. The beliefs activated the body's cellular memory, weakening the body and impeding its function. Yet for a time, while performance was dulled it was steady. A balance was maintained that suited his purposes.

He became afraid that the body would go out of control and commit violent action, because he was of course aware of the strength of the denied thoughts and feelings. When a crisis situation arose or when he became lost in despair, an acceleration began that he pretended not to notice, and Augustus Two would appear.

Augustus Two was filled with a sense of power—because Augustus considered power wrong and set it aside from what he thought of as his normal self. Yet Augustus knew the body needed the vitality that he had denied it. Therefore enter Augustus Two with his great ideas of extraordinary power, vigor and superiority and with fantasies of exceptional heroism and the memories of all of those denied by Augustus himself.

Aggressive action conveniently forgotten by Augustus was now recalled with exuberant glee by Augustus Two. As a result the chemical nature of the body was instantly revitalized. Muscular tone was greatly improved. There were changes in the amount of sugar in the blood and an alteration in the flow of energy throughout the body.

I knew when Ruburt interviewed Augustus that the young man identified Augustus Two with the left side of himself. In his normal state that side of the body contained more tension than the right.

In Augustus Two, the tension found release and the energy flow became more even after initial bursts of activity. The longer Augustus Two stayed, however, the weaker his position became — a fact recognized by Augustus and Augustus Two. Augustus, you see, had to build up sufficient repressed thought and emotion because of a situation with which he could not cope. This threat would then bring about the emergence of Augustus Two. The body behaves as you think it must behave, so Augustus and Augustus Two, with their alternating patterns of behavior, caused the body to react in quite different ways.

Forget now that in this case such a division occurred, and imagine instead the successive thoughts and feelings that you possess. When you feel weak you are weak. When you feel joyful your body benefits and becomes stronger. Augustus's case simply shows in exaggerated form the effects of your beliefs upon your physical image. If you think, "Aha, then from now on I will only think good thoughts — and therefore be healthy, and inhibit my 'bad' thoughts, or do anything at all with them but think them," then in your own way you are doing what Augustus did. He began by believing that some of his thoughts were so evil that they must somehow be made nonexistent. So inhibiting what you consider as negative thoughts, or assuming that they are so terrible, is no answer.